Do you know that your pelvis is the root of a lot of power in your body?
Everyone is on a continual journey of learning, unlearning, and relearning. While it’s a challenge to upskill ourselves, the learning cycle encapsulates the beauty of life. But being out of tune with your body, especially your pelvis, could hinder your personal growth and healing. If you didn’t know about the significant role your pelvis plays in your life, then you’re about to find out.
In this episode of Unlearn Lab, Brittney Ellers discusses the importance of pelvic care. By tapping into the pelvis and menstrual cycle, you’ll be able to heal, grow, and create. Finally, you will be able to learn new information about your body and unlearn shame and guilt to live an empowered life.
If you want to learn more about the power of the pelvis, then this episode is for you!
Here are three reasons why you should listen to this episode:
- Find out why the pelvis is a powerful area in your body.
- Discover how to empower yourself using your menstrual cycle.
- Learn how to keep your creative juices flowing and balance your energy.
- Women’s Anatomy of Arousal: Secret Maps to Buried Pleasure by Sheri Winston
- Finding God Through Sex: Awakening the One of Spirit Through the Two of Flesh by David Deida
- To Be Magnetic, The #1 Destination for Neural Manifestation
- Being Better website
- Connect with Brittney: LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube
- Free Scale Your Impact Collective (upcoming membership) workshop on inclusive leadership
- Where people can read the shownotes
- Download my 1:1 services guide
- Contact me for speaking events or collaborative engagement
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/embodied_impact/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/jessicamoy_
- Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/drjessicamoy
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/embodiedimpactconsulting
[04:25] What Brittney Learned and Unlearned
- She just finished Women’s Anatomy of Arousal by Sheri Winston.
- Brittany resonated with Sheri’s biography because her sexuality, intimate relationships, and professional work contributed to where she’s currently at.
- She had to unlearn a lot of shame and guilt from her adulthood until now.
- She didn’t intend to go into the realm of pelvic health until she learned how women were treated in medicine.
[04:25] The Importance of the Biopsychosocial Model
- The psychosocial part is the reality that we live in.
- Learning more about your spirituality helps you become aware of the biopsychosocial parts and emotional layers in people.
- The pelvis is a powerful and special area in one’s body.
[08:53] The Power of the Pelvis
- The pelvic bowl has a set of three bones that act as a holder for muscles, ligaments, and nerve endings that supply support and structure; it’s also a house of pleasure.
- If you’re experiencing financial, health, or emotional instability, you may have issues with your root chakra.
- Tapping into the sacral chakra can make you feel connected with what you’re trying to birth and the magic of creation.
- If you experience shame or someone crosses your boundaries, it might block the sacral chakra.
[15:59] Holistic Pelvic Care Experience
- Brittney had a healing experience with a practitioner in San Diego.
- In that experience, she discovered that her left side, which is the feminine side, was very pronounced. However, her masculinity feels absent.
- The assessment made her realize her lack of “masculinity” in her business.
- These things may link back to other energetics in your life — and for Brittney, it was her familial relationships and religious upbringing.
[20:52] Brittney’s Journey in Growth and Healing
- While she’s healed, the wound needs massaging from time to time.
- In her relationships, she went through tough breakups and gained breakthroughs.
- Trying out new things helped her with her growth and confidence.
- She’s also been doing shadow work and reading up on trauma during the pandemic.
- She knew she could instill abundant knowledge and empowerment when it comes to menstrual health and tap into the power of the menstrual cycle.
[26:52] On Growth and Celebration
- She recently experienced being guided in a pussy-painting party.
- Not many women have gazed down at that area of their bodies to explore and discover its beauty.
- Healing and celebration can occur simultaneously.
[31:23] Keeping Creativity Flowing
- Brittney intentionally works six hours with conscious breaks in between.
- On her menstrual cycle, she found that her ideas are overflowing.
- If she finds something that feels exciting and aligned, she posts it.
[34:12] Harnessing the Menstrual Cycle
- The menstrual cycle has four phases that can coincide with the lunar phase. Those who don’t menstruate can refer to the lunar cycle.
- First, the follicular phase is where you can plan and brainstorm.
- The ovulatory phase is when you execute your plans and explore ideas further.
- You can wrap things up and get things done best while in the luteal phase.
- Finally, the period phase may require more alone time to rest and reflect. Being more intentional with your time could be helpful as well.
[39:42] Balancing Your Energy
- While in her late luteal phase, she knew her period was starting on the weekend. At the same time, she also had two weddings she wanted to attend.
- She advised her boyfriend that she might need extra downtime in between.
- In the end, she had fun during the weekend without interrupting her period cycle.
[39:42] Tracking Your Cycle
- You must be your biggest cheerleader.
- Syncing with your cycle is crucial so you’ll know how to take care of your body and listen to what it needs at the moment.
[47:06] Final Words
- She offers mentorships and workshops to embrace your sexuality and explore feminine and masculine energies.
- If someone met her for the first time, she wishes they’d ask, “What’s lighting you up?”
- The new altar she built for herself, along with her crystals, trinkets, and cards intending to worship her femininity, lights her up now.
Brittney Ellers is a holistic pelvic physical therapist, women’s mentor, and yoga instructor. She offers holistic, accessible, and personalized pelvic care and coaching that helps people feel free, confident, and empowered.
She founded Being Better, which helps individuals create a life they love through optimal health and wellness through a blend of physical therapy and yoga. She focuses on women’s health: prenatal, postpartum, pelvic floor, hormonal and menstrual management, and education. She’s also the Program Director at Slowbirth Collective’s San Diego Chapter, where she creates, manages, and coordinates programs for reproductive health and wellness.
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Brittney Ellers: The pelvic bowl itself is a set of bones. You have three bones that make up the pelvic bowl, which is in reality a carrier, a holder. Yes, there are muscles, yes, there are fascia, ligaments, and nerve endings that supply, not only support and structure to your physical being, but also your energetic being — and it’s a house of pleasure.
Jess Moy: Welcome to Unlearn Lab with me, your host, Jess Moy. Together, we’re going to demystify what culture really means nowadays, and how we can show up as our whole-ass human self through the lens of wellness, entrepreneurship, and impact.
Really thriving in the long run requires you to remember who you really are, unplug from the matrix, and write your own damn story. We are going to cover some serious ground together, y’all. From what culture really means to unpacking modern-day spirituality, to peeling back the layers of multi-passionate entrepreneurship, we are going to explore it all together. Let’s unlearn some shit.
Hello, hello, everyone. This is the first podcast episode of Unlearn Lab. I’m here with my friend, Brittney, who was so gracious enough to share her presence and expertise on all the things we are going to dive into today — pelvic health, health care, what it means for well-being as a woman-identifying person, and more.
I would love, Brittney if you could just give us a little bit of your story and where you are residing in this earth since we are literally so far apart. We’re oceans away, literally oceans away — and what you’d like to share with everyone?
Brittney: Well, first, thank you for having me as the inaugural guest — so excited. You’re such an expander for me in so many ways. I live in Encinitas, California, which you have been here before, obviously — and I love it here. I am a pelvic physical therapist. I kind of started taking out the pelvic floor part because while people maybe know what that is, I want it to feel more encompassing than the pelvic floor, which is a group of muscles, and nerves, and fascia, and energy so that I can get the whole picture.
I think of myself as a holistic pelvic physical therapist. Plus — just a plus sign right there — I teach yoga. I do a lot of things — a lot of female or women’s health education, I’m a period advocate, menstrual health advocate, and much more. But we’ll start there.
Jess: We’re going to totally dive into all of those things. I think it would be really prudent to talk about what was your or maybe part of your unlearning process in getting to this idea of pelvic health as a holistic approach because I also, in my previous nine lives of careers, was a physical therapist. For those that don’t know, I also dabbled in women’s health and pelvic health, and then school.
That’s not really something that was focused on in terms of energetics and the emotional pieces that come with pelvic health. I’d love to learn your take, and what you had to kind of learn and unlearn that molded you into where you are in your current business and journey.
Brittney: It’s so multi-layered and faceted, of course, because that’s who we are as humans. For me, it’s funny because I just finished reading Women’s Anatomy of Arousal by Sheri Winston. In the end, she talks about her biography, and I really resonated with that because she was saying her sexuality, her intimate relationships and her professional work all contributed to where she’s at now. For me, that was, to a tee, very, very true.
I learned a lot of good stuff growing up and in school. In my adulthood, I had to unlearn a lot of shame and guilt, and still have to unlearn a lot. For me in school, too, in grad school, specifically, pelvic health was thought of as maybe an extracurricular even. It was mandatory to learn this in our therapeutic exercise course.
But it definitely also wasn’t my intention to go into this realm until I learned how women were treated in medicine, especially through pregnancy, and postpartum, and in menopause — and we’re not treated well. We don’t get believed — we’re not believed when we share a lot of our symptoms. I felt lucky, at least in school for me.
We did learn kind of a basic biopsychosocial model of treating people, but then you also don’t really realize that until you’ve been working with humans for a few years that this is truly how people operate, and just because it’s a physical symptom doesn’t mean it’s physical all the time, and vice versa. It’s not every emotional thing that’s happening to you might actually come from a physical thing, and it’s so layered.
Jess: Totally. I think, too, when we talk about this biopsychosocial model of how we initially learn, we — in at least our field of healthcare — start at that biophase, like phase or area. Then, “psycho” and “social” kind of support the “bio”. But it’s almost like we should have had more space to learn the “psycho” and the “social” piece because that’s the primary thing that can affect, especially things that reside in the body that we don’t always look at. It’s just really funny.
Brittney: I mean, if you think about it too, it’s like the psychosocial part is the reality that we live in biologically. It’s funny because in yoga — and you probably know this too — even in my religious upbringing and learning more about my spirituality, just understanding that each human, yes, has in their body, the biopsychosocial part.
Then, there are spiritual layers, and emotional layers, and heart layers. Really coming into my work and my practice, and even especially because the pelvis is such a powerful and special area in a person’s body, you have to approach it that way.
Jess: Totally. I want to go into that because before I knew about even the pelvic floor from a physical therapy standpoint, before I knew about it in yoga from the sacral route standpoint, I didn’t know anything. I would love for you to kind of go into — what are the energetics of the pelvis? What do they mean for us, especially as ovary owners, or women-identifying folks beyond the muscles, and the nerves, and the fascia? What is the pelvis?
Brittney: The pelvic bowl itself is a set of bones. You have three bones that make up the pelvic bowl, which is in reality a carrier, a holder. Yes, there are muscles, yes, there are fascia, ligaments, and nerve endings that supply, not only support and structure to your physical being, but also your energetic being — and it’s a house of pleasure. This is creative energy, this is pleasure and joy-sparked energy.
At least for me, the root chakra — so in the yogic system… This is the seven chakra layers that most western people know — starts with the root. Root is number one, and that’s that red energy. To me, in my studies, it means foundation, it means security, its structure. If you say you have some sort of financial instability or health instability, you might have a lot of pain there or issues with this area.
For me, I had emotional instability within some relationships I’ve had in the past. I’ve experienced pelvic dysfunction through urinary incontinence — so leaking when I didn’t want to, or peeing when I didn’t want to or didn’t actually have to pee. Then, going up a layer, we have the sacral energy, the sacral chakra, and that is a creative, sensual, sexual, playful energy that we get to tap into. That’s an orange pillar — very vibrant.
This is almost sandwiched where the womb is, and your womb is also your uterus — for people who have that — and then the fallopian tubes, the ovaries if you have those as well. This is, for me also, just like a powerhouse space because if I tap into that on the regular, I feel so in flow with whatever I’m wanting to create or put out in the world. Some people go through this life, and they decide they want to make babies, or they don’t.
But there are other creations that get to be birthed through your body or through your energy — businesses or creative projects, like a podcast. There’s so many things that we get to put out into the world. Part of this work is if you’ve been shamed for this, or maybe your boundaries have been crossed in any way without your consent, you could be blocked from accessing this creative energy or this feeling of security and safety.
It’s important for us to all have this. That’s why I think this is an area that should not be ignored — and if anything, paid more attention to. In the womb space, there’s a beautiful rhythm that we experience as menstruators. The bleed, the build, the bleed, the build — it’s basically just cleansing and gathering energy that goes back and forth. It gets renewed with us each month.
Jess: I love that, and I love, love, love what you said about this idea that the sacral space in the womb is not just for birthing babies, which in itself is — yes, such a potent and magical process. But also that birthing anything — creative idea, a business, a mission—those are all their own version of new life essentially. I think that, especially in this day and age where I’ve been seeing. I don’t know if it’s the holiday season right now we’re recording this, and it’s going to be Christmas in a few weeks — these memes that are like, people wondering why the millennial generation isn’t having babies because XYZ is going on etc, etc.
Brittney: I haven’t seen those. Send those to me.
Jess: It’s like the world doesn’t care about maternal health care, and millennials can’t pay their student loans, and XYZ, and you’re like, “No wonder we can’t have babies or don’t want to have babies.” And that’s a whole other podcast aside. But I think an unspoken, more positive part about that is we just are finding more freedom and space to recognize the other magic that can happen outside of what was predetermined from a patriarchal system that is procreation.
I think this idea that holistic pelvic health is not just the health of your physical body, but the health of your creative spirit, and the health of — what I want to actually tap into more with you about the idea of shame, and guilt, and the grief around that and moving through that because when I was practicing as well, there were a lot of things, repetitive patterns that were coming up with multiple different patients.
As I moved out of the physical therapy space into more holistic wellness coaching before I moved into even this space, the same things came up. It was like, “I feel blocked in my job, I feel blocked in my relationship, I feel blocked in XYZ.”
They were coming to me with very similar — and again, not one size fits all — but very similar pelvic conditions that I didn’t go fully towards the root of, “There’s a whole certification about doing actual internal pelvic floor work.” I didn’t go that route before I moved out of the physical therapy space.
But it almost was like the work that we were doing more so with what in healthcare would be called “education”, what I would call “empowerment”, and holding space emotionally really created at least some sort of dent in the block that was reproducing, essentially, physical condition. I love, love, love that you said that.
Brittney: That’s exactly what I’ve felt and experienced myself. For me, too, it was having my own experience of what was trademarked as “Holistic Pelvic Care” by Tami Lynn Kent. She’s up in Oregon, experienced it with a practitioner down here in San Diego. It’s a blend of these healing experiences with someone who I guess has intuition that they can tap into, and they add their ability to hold space. For me, it was just so eye-opening. This is an April, so a while ago, early this year.
It was recognized in my body that my left side, which is energetically your feminine side, was very pronounced. She said — what did she say? She was like, “Your left side is like, ‘We know you’re there. I see you.’ But your right side feels empty or absent.” We started talking about the masculine in me, the masculine players in my life, and where they were at. Even then, I talked to my coach who I had at the time, and share this with her. It made me also realize that I was lacking this masculinity in my business, and it was so fascinating to me.
To make this connection, it was huge. This is like — she had gone internally in me, and didn’t move, like didn’t move her finger, but so much was felt. This is how I practice, how I experienced too. I’m not trained under Tami, but I have background in the internal work, and cranial sacral therapy, and reading energies, and then my own intuitive gifts that I get to tap into in my sessions. I totally feel the same way.
Not to put like a blanket statement over anyone’s pelvic dysfunction whether it’s bowel and bladder, or sexual, which this can go for anybody. Doesn’t have to be a female body. These things can be linked back to other energetics in your life. For me, it would definitely be familial, ancestral relationships, and my current, this lifetime religious upbringing that’s still programmed in me. I keep going deeper and deeper into these layers.
It’s funny because as of two nights ago, I just picked up a book called Finding God Through Sex, and that’s by David Deida. I’m really excited to read into it because, like I said, there’s spirituality that gets involved in our human bodies. To me, it’s like one and the same.
Jess: 100%. I want to tap into the human that is you behind this idea, and this movement towards holistically holding space for — I was almost going to say treating, but treating is…
Brittney: It’s so out.
Jess: It’s so out. We’re saying — I still say words that I catch myself being like, “Why are we still using this word? It doesn’t encompass the totality.” But I want to tap into your own personal journey with this.
I know in the very beginning, you mentioned the “shaman”, you’re talking about what this practice looks like with your religion in this lifetime, and maybe giving us a little taste of the experience that you’ve had to move through or bend moving through to get to a point where you are now of being like, “Oh, okay, I can practice this with myself while I’m also practicing this with other people.”
Because I think a really interesting thing that someone told me way back when I was — I think it might have been in when I was doing more somatic work and trauma-informed work. I had this thought to myself of, “How can I hold space for people’s trauma when I’m traumatized?” But the truth of it is we’re always growing through and healing our own things, and that doesn’t mean that we can’t do what we’re doing.
I wanted to kind of get your take on how you navigated that, and where that’s kind of led you up until this point.
Brittany: Totally. Just to dovetail off of that a little bit too, I read — my friend writes beautiful poetry, and she wrote the other day, “never share from an open wound”. I feel really lucky that I’ve gone through what I’ve gone through, and I could say, “I’m healed.” But it’s almost like the scar needs massaging, so that’s what I’m doing right now.
Not to say that I don’t get re-traumatized or injured — that I won’t in the future. But it’s been quite the journey. I would probably start with just even relationships, and going through a couple of tough, tough breakups. But then realizing that through the breakups, there were breakthroughs, and my other friend put it this way — talking to another friend who had just gone through a breakup — that it was more like breaking open your heart to new things, whether it was experiences for yourself or another partner.
But those heartbreaks really cracked me open wide, to the world of even starting my own business. It’s funny because a lot of this happened — bam, bam, bam, bam — breakup, new job, breakup, I started my own business and went out on my own officially, and it felt amazing for a full, full year, and then COVID. But in the meantime, I was doing a lot of practice for my individual self-growth. I don’t think I was even focusing so much on my sexuality as much.
In the meantime, though, I was doing what I would consider really brave, and maybe to some people, extreme things. My friend has classes, art classes, where she hires nude models. She asked me to do it, and I said, “yes.” This is kind of the start where I was finally comfortable in tight leggings and a sports bra while taking or teaching yoga. But this was a whole level of comfort within myself that I felt like this was going to help me get there — like being naked in front of a bunch of strangers and some friends.
The person I was dating at the time felt like an extra step that I needed. Then, throughout COVID, I was actually doing a lot of shadow work and reading a lot about trauma. In the meantime, also learning about like manifestation and getting unblocked — and this was through Lacy Phillips, To Be Magnetic if you haven’t picked up on that. That was all very powerful too.
In the meantime, business is doing okay — like trying out new things, and feeling into more of an online space because that’s where we were at. Even though at the time, I could have kept treating people, but people that I was working with weren’t comfortable with it, which is fine. It allowed me to try out a bunch of new avenues of working and making an impact on people — which is also where I realized, “Oh, I can make an impact on people without using my hands.”
Although, this is where I feel very comfortable, and I know I’m good at touch. That’s one of my love languages. It has been for like the past five years — professionally speaking even. I knew I could instill a lot of knowledge and empowerment through what I was sharing, especially online when it came to period health, menstrual health, and tapping into the power of the menstrual cycle itself. Holy shit. Can I cuss? You cuss right?
Jess: We’re going to put an explicit — for ears over the age of, I don’t know, 14? But at the age — kids cuss now these days.
Brittany: I remember going through a grocery store when I was eight years old with my friends and just plotting beforehand, “We’re going to say all the bad words. Can we just talk like we’re bad?” Then, we just started going like, “F-bomb this!”, “Shit this!” It was so funny.
Jess: I also think about back in the day the CDs that were parental whatever.
Jess: Parental advisory, and you’re like, “Oh, my God! That CD.” Also, CD — makes me feel like a diamond. Makes me feel like a dinosaur. But…
Brittney: Wait, what does that stand for again?
Jess: Compact disc. I’d be like, “Oh my god, she got up explicit content CD. She’s so cool.” Now, cursing is just part of the vocabulary. I remember a friend being — it’s just having an emotional exclamation mark at the end of your sentence, and I’m like — or in your sentences — and I’m like, “Fuck, yeah! That’s exactly what it is.”
Brittney: Yes. No, it should for that extra impact and effect.
Jess: So no filter. No filter here.
Brittney: Great. I mean, I realized that I had this ability to speak and to share fun content. Well, I thought it was fun. It’s fun to make when you’re tapped into that creativity.
Brittney: Today, I just posted a photo today. For the first time, yesterday, had an experience with four other women and was guided into a pussy-painting party.
Jess: That sounds awesome.
Brittney: It was fucking amazing. I kid you not, these ideas have come to me. I think it’s definitely, as a PT, it’s interesting that there aren’t many women who have gazed down — or people with vulvas — haven’t gazed down at this area of their body to intentionally look and discover what’s there, and then, to also find beauty in it.
This is something that I thought about yesterday after this experience is like, “Wow, I’ve been doing so much healing work. I’m just a traumatized victim, I need healing before I can be my highest self.” It’s like, no, no, no, no, no. You can do this work, and then there’s also the expansion, there’s also the growth and the celebration that can happen simultaneously — yes.
At least for me, in this experience, this was like a specific celebratory time for me. I just thought, “Wow, like, I didn’t think I’d really get here like this, and how fucking cool.”
Jess: And now you’re here.
Brittney: For my business, The Nautilus Shell — actually not even for just my business. The Nautilus Shell has always been a very strong symbol for me. The first time I went to visit undergrad, my school — U-Dub, I stayed at the Nautilus Inn. I didn’t even know that until after the fact I joined a sorority whose symbol was the nautilus shell. I didn’t know that when I signed up. It was just a sign that kept popping up for me.
When I finally recognize that, “Oh, this is my universal sign that I’m on a good path for myself.” It started popping up everywhere. But generally, that symbolism of the Fibonacci sequence, the perfect spiral, it symbolizes to me just growth and expansion, and so much.
Jess: So speaking of expansion, you mentioned the content being easier when essentially the cork is untapped. How do you keep the tap uncorked? How do you tap into that creative room space that stays open? Because, again, this conversation is so much more beyond even menstrual health, and period health,and pelvic health.
When I think about — I’m 100%, and advocate for those spaces as well. If you know me, I based my whole business model on supporting people. If you’re not an ovary owner or you don’t menstruate, how can you make business leadership, your life more sustainable and cyclical? I’m such an advocate for that.
But coming back to that energetic piece of creativity and keeping that tapped in because so often, I do find that, especially if you’re in the entrepreneurial space, it’s hard to keep that creativity flowing. When that comes only from you, and there’s now this external pressure of productivity, and performing, and producing new and exciting stuff, it gets to be a lot. What do you do for that?
Brittney: I’m not only a menstruator, but a projector. I was just thinking about this, this week because I have a new office space, and it’s really exciting for me.
Jess: For those that know, projectors are if you follow human design.
Brittney: I like to work maybe max six hours — intentional six hours. I might have a 10-hour workday, but it’s with conscious breaks in between where I’m fueling myself, I’m exercising or stretching, or doing whatever I need to do to keep me going. But six hours would be like a long day for me. Ideally, it’s three to four hours. But on my menstrual cycle, I found over the past couple weeks since I finished my period — probably on like the eighth.
It’s been about a week of me in follicular phase. These ideas are coming in like — bam, bam, bam. Again, I almost don’t have time to keep up. But this is when — if I’m scrolling on TikTok or on Instagram, and I like something — I’m saving sounds, I’m writing these ideas down in my calendar, and kind of plotting when I would schedule this because another thing is I don’t really resonate anymore with planning things crazy out. I work with anyone else, I don’t have a VA. It’s kind of just me plotting it in.
Sometimes, that really helps me especially if I have something to launch like a workshop or a program. But for the most part, everything is very — if I’m excited about it, and it feels aligned, then I’m posting it.
Jess: 100%. You mentioned follicular phase. We could literally, y’all, go into an entire podcast — no, series of podcasts diving into the menstrual cycle. But could you give everyone a SparkNotes…
Brittney: A CliffsNotes?
Jess: A CliffsNotes’ summary of the cycles, and at least how you would harness them from activities or tasks perspective. Also, for our folks that don’t menstruate or are not ovary owners, what they could do instead to follow that natural ebb and flow that we talked about?
Brittney: 100%. So four phases — and just to break it down, those four phases can coincide with the lunar phase. If you don’t menstruate, or you don’t own a womb or ovaries, or anything, you can use the lunar cycle. Okay, follicular phase. This is also on an annual, seasonal basis. Follicular — I like to think of it as the follicle of your hair. This is the beginning. The beginning of plants is spring, the beginning of the moon cycle is the first quarter.
This is a phase where I have the most creative energy. This is where I’m actually structuring anything I need to structure, I’m planning or brainstorming new ideas for workshops, or even treatments for myself or workouts for myself, I’m like doing anything new that’s going to stimulate something that I haven’t experienced before.
Then, in ovulation, or in ovulatory phase, that coincides with the full moon and summer. This is a very outward phase. If I’ve done all my planning right, this is where I’m actually doing things like this. I’m almost ovulating, so I like to structure anything that social or requires some verbal competence during my ovulatory phase. I’m doing a lot of bulk writing or blogging if I’m blogging, which I haven’t done in a while. But I find that I journal better too, and get deeper ideas, and a deeper understanding of what I want.
I love socializing around this phase as well. If you’re in business, networking, scheduling really important calls, or meetings where you’re asking for a raise, going on a first date — all that kind of good, fun stuff. People are more apt to agree with you and say “yes” to you, right. Then, you move into luteal phase, which is the longest phase of a menstrual cycle. This is the third quarter moon, this is your fall. This is where I like to wrap a lot of things up and just get things done. The to-do list feels really good.
Cleaning house, literally — within the human body, within your human living space, within your business, within your inbox, check all your boxes, tie up your loose ends. It feels really good to the brain to do this. As you get closer to what would be a new moon phaser, a period phase taking a lot more alone time because your energy — while I believe you can have kind of like a Ying Yang complex within you, most people are nice complex of introvert-extrovert. This is a phase where it’s like you’re going introverted.
This is also where you get those kinds of downloads and new information about what you can, then, take into your menstrual phase. Again, new moon phase or your winter, within your business or within yourself, to reflect and like look back on what you did, what you accomplished, who you are, and feel into that. See what still resonates. Rest your body, rest your mind, rest your activity level. Again, if you need more alone time, take it.
Sometimes, I feel good being more one-on-one with other bleeding sisters. That can be a nice thing too. Just be really intentional with your time, especially in this phase, because it is so special and cool.
Jess: Totally. That’s a good synopsis I think.
Brittney: Cool. I’ve gotten pretty good at spewing that out.
Jess: When you say it like that, it flows so intuitively. But for a lot of people, this idea is super foreign. What I will say about this—because this is also how I operate both my life and my business—is that it’s always a work in progress. It doesn’t happen in an instant. There are going to be times where you are having to be extroverted when you’re in that bleeding phase, or you have to check the to-dos when you may not have the energy.
It’s just about balancing and experimenting. I think there was a phrase in PT school and in life that was so frustrating. The maniacal type A in me was like, “Why don’t you have an answer?” When I would ask these types of questions of, “What if this happens where it’s more situational?” The professors would always say, “It depends.” I’d be like, “Well, I can’t put ‘it depends’ on the multiple-choice answer.” So you have to tell what the answer is.
Brittney: Oh, my God! It’s so true. But I mean, you’re right. That, ideally, would be what happens every single month, every single year. But for example — here’s a situational thing where I’ll ask you like, “What would you have done?” Then, I’ll say what I did. I was in luteal phase, late luteal phase, and I knew I was going to start my period either on Saturday or Sunday.
I had two weddings to go to in one weekend, and these were weddings I had committed to, I wanted to be there, I was excited to be there. Luckily, they were both local here in San Diego — one on Friday, one on Saturday. How do you think I did it?
Jess: I don’t know, Brittney. How did you do it?
Brittney: I, number one, let my boyfriend know because he was my date. He was the one whose friends were getting married. I let him know right off the bat, communicated that, “I’m going to be in this phase. I might need some extra downtime in between our activities, and I need you to listen to me when I say, ‘I’m ready to go’ or anything like that.” He was like, “100%, thank you for letting me know. It’s great to know.”
We go to the wedding on Friday — all is good. We ended up going to like the after-party at the hotel which we were staying at. By 11 o’clock I was toast. We had danced, we had fun, we had some good food, good laughs, good drinks, which I don’t normally drink more than two drinks a night if I go out. But this is a celebration, so we were doing that. I tapped out at 11. I went to bed and fueled my body for the next day.
We had a really awesome brunch the next day, it was just the two of us. Following the second wedding, we took a nice long nap — and before the Friday wedding, I took another nap. I took that extra time for myself because I knew I was going to need it especially if I wanted to look really fucking good on the dance floor, and just whip out all the moves, which I did.
But then, Sunday after the second wedding, which was also another, “It’s midnight, I’m going to go to bed.” He was down for that too after having two weddings. Sunday was just like a mellow day — brunch, come home, sleep, nap, whatever, and just took care of ourselves. Then, I got through that Sunday. It was like my period knew that it could wait for me.
Jess: It is crazy too — half the battle with this. This might be a personal projection, but the thing that is the hardest in creating something that is beneficial to you and your body is the self-discipline piece, and the caveat being the grace to move with and move forward when the self-discipline is not there because that too is part of this foundational feeling of security, that you’re not in a world where we get shamed as ovary owners and women identifying people. The last thing we need is more shame that comes from ourselves.
Brittney: If anything, we need to be our biggest cheerleader actively because I know we can be our own worst enemy, especially if you identify as a perfectionist. I was on Tik Tok the other day that was like, “If you’re an empath, you’re most likely a people pleaser. If you’re a people pleaser, you’re also most likely a perfectionist. And if you are a perfectionist, you’re most likely a self-sabotager, and you need boundaries.” And you’re like, “Ugh.”
Jess: That’s like a dagger to the gut. Okay, fucking drag me TikTok. Get me out of this algorithm that I’m in.
Brittney: It’s like “for you”, literally “for you page”. Thank you. But, no. With the self-discipline thing, I just wanted to touch on this too because the cycle syncing, which is altering what you’re doing, altering what you’re eating, how you’re moving according to your cycle is one thing. But I started cycle tracking — like legit tracking everything about six months ago.
This is a discipline where I wake up, first thing I’m doing is sticking a thermometer under my tongue and measuring my basal body temperature, recording it, and then saying good morning to my honey if he’s here. It’s times when I forget to do it — it’s not very often because it’s literally right next to my bed on top of my phone, which is my alarm — it’s that or it’s not marking down my cervical mucus, or position, or if or not I had sex, that kind of stuff that is…
That kind of stuff is necessary if you’re using it for birth control, which I am. But it’s having a little bit of grace with all the other things I think that you’re wanting to touch on because in the end also, it’s cool as a menstruator that your blood is your litmus test. But it is totally a practice. My blood is not perfect every single month. At least in the past two years, I’ve known three periods that were kind of funky for different reasons, and it’s just more information for me to know better how to treat my body.
Jess: The same thing with data — looking at the data. I am kind of a weird data nerd when it comes to… Less when it came to actually physical therapy biology stuff, but more of just like the social-cultural data scene, and it tells us a story. If you are tracking, and if you are starting to go on this cyclical journey — it’s just data.
Honestly, everything’s an experiment. It just gives you tools to change up the next thing. I would love for you to share so that we have some time of how you’re supporting your community in this process, and what’s coming down the pipeline for you because I think your work is so important and potent, and really shifting the tide for what women’s health means.
It’s something that I’ve been really passionate about, and I know even people that are new to this sphere are like, “Oh, door just opened. I didn’t even know that was a potential for me.” I’m all about expanding our potential, really, whether or not it lands with us in a long-term sense. At least you can see that you have an option. What are people’s opportunities to experience more of your work?
Brittney: I have a lot of great content on my website and on my Instagram. I love just popping in there and spewing little tidbits about all of this stuff, not just menstrual cycle stuff. I work one-on-one with people — in person and virtually. I offer many workshops — not consistently scheduled, but the content is usually beefed up every time I learned something new, take another course, or read another really amazing book. Every time you come, it’s going to be a little bit different, which is, I think, great.
If you’ve been to one of my things before, come again because it’ll probably be new. I offer mentorship as well, which is for someone who is really ready for this kind of transformation because this is not easy stuff. For me, it took a long time. But in order to transition off birth control, that was a little sequence that I took myself through successfully.
Then, in here exploring more of my feminine and masculine energies — like touching into my sexuality and feeling more into this creative energy, and how that impacts not only myself, my business, but also my relationships with my partner, with everyone else in my world. This is the transformation that can happen where you’re not just healed, but in growth, and you’re supported in this. Not to toot my own horn, but in this crazy up level.
Brittney: Which can be really scary too. And talking about up levels, it’s like there are old versions of you that have to die off, and there’s a grieving with that. Having someone support you in it is really lovely. I worked with a coach for six months, and it wasn’t on period stuff, but definitely on the things that I needed support in. It was so transformational, and that’s what’s offered with this.
Who knows? In the future, maybe some more event-like things because what I’m learning also as I experienced my inner shifts is that — I don’t think I’m just an educator. I am a facilitator and can hold space, and create experience. But I also love doing it in collaboration. I’m constantly in collaboration with very amazing people. There’s also an opportunity for some nonprofit work in the birth world for marginalized and really deserving people that don’t necessarily get the care that they need. Yeah. So stay and look out for that.
Jess: I love that. We here at Unlearn Lab are all about making people, people again, and really this conversation has been so expanding to me because I think in the realm of digital and internet, we always see things from a singular lens.
I hope you feel as well that you get to like experience, not just the expertise, and the knowledge, and the foundation that’s so important, but also the person behind that that’s taking the effort to learn, and to unlearn, and to create. Again, just make people, people again.
The question that I’d like to ask everyone is — I personally really hate when you go into a new setting and you meet someone for the first time, and they’re like, “Oh, what do you do?” And you’re just like, “Ugh, this again.” I’d love to ask people what is the question that you wish someone that was meeting you for the first time would ask you instead of that question?
Brittney: I would hope someone would just ask me, “What’s lighting you up right now?” Or, “What are you reading?”
Jess: I love that. I love that. How would you answer?
Brittney: Well, currently, it’s this new altar that I made for myself — really enjoying all these pieces. I’m gung-ho about my crystals. After having the pussy-painting party, I just put together an altar for my ancestors, the females that came before me, and little tokens, like rings that belong to my grandmother’s, other little trinkets and cards and stuff that really helped me worship my femininity.
Jess: I love that.
Brittney: That’s lighting me up right now.
Jess: Well, thank you so, so much for spending time with me, and spending time with this community. I’m just really excited to see where you go.
Brittney: Thank you so much, Jess, for having me. It was so fun.